


The greater good

by curl



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Comfort, I'm dying squirtle, M/M, Suicide mention, i guess lmao, i'm absolutely behind the clone shiro theory and i'm not being very subtle about it, set right after s4
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-13
Updated: 2017-11-13
Packaged: 2019-02-01 22:03:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12713820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/curl/pseuds/curl
Summary: Team Voltron learns that Keith wanted to sacrifice himself to stop Haggar and Keith is unsure how to face them.





	The greater good

Keith was happy to see them, if only for a few minutes and on a screen. It had been a few days since they - well, since Lotor had stopped Haggar from blowing up several solar systems at once and he hadn't had the chance to talk to Team Voltron until now. Kolivan was keeping a very tight schedule.

There they were, all of them together on the screen, looking complete even without him.  
He missed being around them. He missed Coran's odd antics, or the way Pidge and Hunk would lose everyone in their conversations - which must have gotten even worse now that Matt had joined them - he even missed Lance's commentary to everything. Keith had found himself more than once anticipating Lance's voice, only to turn around and find the other Blades following protocol as stoically as always.

Keith smiled at them, but it faded when he noticed that only Allura was giving him a - somewhat forced - smile in return. They didn't quite look all that happy to see him.  
"Hello Keith," Allura said, her hands folded neatly in front of her. She, like the others, was still wearing her paladin uniform from the mission they had just returned from.  
And she deserved to wear it. Keith knew this was the way it was supposed to be, that his place in Team Voltron had always been meant to be temporary.  
But it still hurt.  
"Hello, Princess. Hey, guys," he responded, trying not to let their expressions get to him.  
Shiro looked at him, neutral, but his eyerbrows were creasing ever so slightly. "How are you?", he asked.  
"I'm good, great," Keith answered, "We're closing in on the location of the quintessence source quickly and-"  
Shiro cut him off. "I didn't ask for a mission update, I asked how you are." He did sound like he cared about the answer, but there was an impatience in his voice, which it had carried ever since he escaped the Galra a second time, and Keith just couldn't get used to it.  
When Keith took a moment too long to respond, Pidge spoke up, "Matt told us what happened." Behind her, Matt averted his gaze.  
keith didn't understand right away, until Hunk remarked, "I can't believe I'd ever be glad that Lotor showed up anywhere."  
He clenched his fists. "I had to-" he began, but Lance threw his arms in the air and interrupted him.  
"You just _had_ to play the hero, classic. You only ever think about yourself!", he snapped.  
Keith glared at Lance with indignation. How could he say that, when in reality Keith had thought about everyone _but_ himself when he made the decision to sacrifice himself to stop Haggar?  
"That's not true!", he blurted out, eyes starting to burn, but Lance was barely listening.  
"I know, I know!", Lance yelled, "I get it! The greater good, blah blah! But that doesn't mean we don't get to be upset over almost losing you!"  
Keith's expression changed from angry to surprised.  
"Lance," Shiro interjected calmly but firmly, and Lance crossed his arms and turned away, now facing Hunk, who put a hand on his shoulder.

Shiro looked at Keith again. "It was a really close call, we're glad you're okay."  
Keith couldn't hold his gaze for long; he didn't know how to feel, he couldn't tell if Shiro's words were sincere.  
He didn't say anything, and Shiro continued, "Tell Kolivan I need to talk to him."  
"I will," Keith answered. "See you later."

 

Shiro had requested for Kolivan to come to the Castle of Lions as soon as possible to discuss extensive plans with the information Lotor had provided.  
Kolivan took Keith with him. The head of the Blades usually wasn't one to be sentimental, but maybe he could tell that it was hard for Keith to be away from his old team.

Keith didn't know how they would react to seeing him, though. Their last conversation hadn't exactly gone well.  
When he and Kolivan entered the bridge, everyone was already gathered there, awaiting them, and Keith felt like hiding behind the much taller Galra in order to avoid the confrontation.  
Shiro was the first to approach and hugged him briefly in greeting, but it felt more as if he did it out of obligation than because he actually wanted to.  
Hunk and Pidge, however, didn't hesitate to lock him in their arms as soon as they saw him. They only let go to make room for Allura.  
"It's good to see you're well," she said and hugged him, too.  
Keith was overwhelmed with relief, but at the same time knowing that he would have to leave again soon stung even more.  
Lance walked up behind Allura, with his hands in his pockets and a grumpy pout on his lips, and he barely looked at Keith before pulling him into a hug as well.  
Keith did not expect such an affectionate gesture from Lance. For a few moments, he was frozen, but eventually he put his hands on Lance's back, and Lance closed his arms tighter around him.  
Keith all but burried his face in Lance's shoulder, trying to take in as much of him as he could.

Way too soon, Lance let go again and Keith couldn't look at any of them directly. A mix of emotions made his head swirl and he could barely form a clear thought. It was so hard to imagine that they actually cared for him, and that they would grieve over him.  
"I'm sorry," he mumbled as he took a step back and hesitated before he turned to Kolivan, who was engaged in a conversation with Shiro.  
"Permission to be dismissed?", Keith asked, his voice almost failing, and he silently prayed that Kolivan would not ask questions.  
The others around him gave him confused looks, but all Keith wanted was to escape the situation to get rid of the rising panic inside of him.  
The Galra looked at Keith for a moment, who struggled to hold his gaze, and simply said, "Granted."  
Keith turned around on his heel immediately and rushed towards the door. He heard Lance call after him but ignored it.  
Tears were burning in his eyes and when he was outside and the door closed behind him, he took a few deep breaths, trying desperately to calm himself down.

When the door slid open again, he turned away and wiped over his eyes with his hands.  
"Keith." He recognized Lance's voice, calm, almost hesitant.  
"I'm sorry, I, I know this is.. really pathetic, I just, I'm sorry," he stuttered, holding back sobs.  
"Keith," Lance repeated and Keith fell silent.  
"What was I supposed to do?", he asked quietly after a few moments, completely at his wit's end. His voice got louder. "She was going to blow up _everything_! I didn't mean to hurt anyone!"  
Lance looked at him with a frown. "I'm sorry for what I said the other day. I get why you did it."  
Keith turned around slowly, meeting Lance's now glassy eyes as he spoke on. "For the cause and all. I don't know if it had been the right thing to do.. had Lotor not shown up. I don't know if I could have made that choice." Lance averted his eyes now. "It.. it might as well have been the decision that.. completely changed the game, that saved the entire universe. And you would be a hero, but you'd also be dead."

They stood there for a while, facing each other but eyes cast down.  
Keith heard Lance sniffle and before he knew it he was pulled into an embrace. This time he did not hesitate to reciprocrate the gesture and closed his arms tightly around Lance.  
Keith couldn't help but sob before saying, "I was so scared. Oh god, I.. I can't even describe it."  
"It's okay. It's all good now," Lance mumbled in a low voice, but they both knew that that wasn't really true. The war was far from over and there was no telling if either of them, or anyone for that matter, was eventually going to be faced with the same decision. Keith had no idea if he would be able to do the same thing again, or if he would be selfish next time, because now he was certain that someone cared and he didn't know if he could bear to leave them for good.

**Author's Note:**

> special thanks to @pftones3482 for beta reading ♥


End file.
